My Communities Influence on Me

This morning on my walk, I was listening to Atomic Habits by James Clear.

The chapter I listened to this morning discussed the importance of the family and friends around you. The people you surround yourself with, influence your habits. So it's important who you surround yourself with.

The timing of this couldn't be more perfect. This theme of who you surround yourself with and devote your energy to seems to be a reoccuring theme during this chapter of my life. Maybe I am just congnizant of it now or maybe its the Universe trying to drill a message into my thick skull, but either way, a lesson to be learned on this journey.

 This past weekend I went to one of my oldest friends bachelorette party. We had a huge house in Cape Cod for 18 woman. At first it was intimidating since I didn't know majority of the woman and that's a lot of people in one house for a whole weekend!

The weekend started and we all meet one another as we arrived to the house and all instantly got along. First, it was absolutely wonderful to be surrounded by so many like minded, inspiring, incredible, bad ass women. The weekend was nourishing for the soul and I was sad to leave all these beautiful people- inside and out (and the goregous house on the water).

Secondly, I was so surprised at first to find we'd all get along so well. It's a lot of different personalities and preferences in one place. But then it was so obvious to me... of course we do!!! We are all really good friends with my girlfriend and this is her community. We all atleast have something in common with eachother because these are the woman she chooses to surround herself with- creative, bad ass, hilarious woman that support her and lift her up.

Lastly, what I thought was really cool was seeing how each of these people do influence her. There were a lot of creative, strong woman that attended which is just like my girlfriend. Seeing who she spends her time with since we were in high school really highlighted how each one of us influence her in different ways and throughout her life since there was girlfriends from all different periods of her life- cousins, highschool, college, career and new friends. And when I say "influence" I dont mean influence as in changing who she is but moreso, bringing out her authenticity. Encouraging those good habits or hobbies that are true to who she is.

"Stick with the people who pull the magic out of you, not the madness."

I am finding for myself is that what James Clear said is so true- it is really is important who you surround yourself with. And to make sure it's those people that lift you up and bring the magic out of you. This has been a big lesson for me lately. Surrounding myself  with people who bring the magic out of me. I have really close friends & family who do exactly that. We connect on a deeper level and always riding shotgun for one another. There is a different level of trust and vulnerability as well as inspiration and growth. It feels effortless and good!! Like the weekend of the bachelorette, nourishing.

And I've had people in my life who didn't do that. I found myself getting anxious and exhausted from exerting so much more energy for what? There is little trust and support. Is it worth it? Instead of spending time and energy in places that bring me anxiety, I am much better off making space for new people in my life that align with who I am and make me feel good!

I had to realize the community I build for myself will help me become the person I strive to be. So I choose to surround myself with those that are supportive, inspiring, and encouarge me to be my best authentic self.

This is the real me,

Yours truly,

JBC.